Oof it's been a journey since I wrote here last. I journeyed though (let's be honest here - I suffered through) pregnancy after loss. I posted on Instagram along the way, and it was hard. Daily anxiety, a 3rd trimester ultrasound that showed her nuchal cord wrapped around her neck, bumping up my induction day, and A LOT of therapy - both CBT and eventually EMDR and Hypnotherapy.
Baby Nora came into the world on May 6, 2021 after a loooong 85-hour gentle induction, using almost every intervention needed to kick start and maintain a progressing labor & delivery - more on her birth story in one of my next blog posts.
Then before Nora turned 6 months old, we were on the move out of California on our way to our new lives in England, where we will likely spend the next 4 years.
Only 18 months back in Monterey and Pacific Grove, CA where Alex and I met, and we had to say those sad goodbyes again to our friends and the coastline we fall back in love with every time we are so lucky to spend time there.
And now we have already been living in England for 6 months. Where does the time go?! I do not know.
We spent Miles' first and second birthdays in California and his 3rd in England. This year definitely felt different. Less heavy in a lot of ways, more disconnected in a lot of ways, and as grief moves and changes as many of us know intimately, felt lighter at the same time as harder. Another year, another new destination and adventure he cannot physically be here with us on.
Last year for Miles' 2nd birthday we used 3 different tree planting organizations to raise money and were able to plant 450 trees across Minnesota (my home state), California (my second home), Oregon (our future *potential* home), and New Zealand (where I lived for 10 months in 2003). The organizations we used were The Arbor Day Foundation, Trees for a Change, and Trees that Count.
This year, I took an idea I had last year and moved it from goal to achieved. I found the wonderful people at The Fruit Tree Planting Foundation and decided to sponsor an entire fruit tree orchard which will be planted on Sept. 12, 2022 in Eerie, PA for the Second Harvest Food Bank. Forty fruiting trees will be planted to produce fruit serving 11 surrounding counties. This was a big undertaking because a project of this size is $4,500. I raised a little over 50% of that and paid out of pocket the remaining $2,000+. Sadly, I don't think I will be able to make it from England to PA on that specific date, but if you'd like to attend and lend a helping hand to plant the trees for Miles' fruit tree orchard, anyone and everyone is welcome to attend.
I will visit in the future for sure.
Thank you for following along on our path through this very bittersweet and often tough life that we lead. I will be blogging a lot more and engaging in my community more as we grow some roots here in England.
One of my first small endeavors is walking 3km/day in June for SANDS Charity. I hope to attend their in-person bereaved parents group one month soon as well.
It goes without the need to say, I will continue to look for ways to honor and remember Miles, while weaving in adventure into this new life abroad with little Nora in tow.
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